You Can Stay at Home, too!!

My favorite paragraph from Matt Walsh's blog post "You're a stay-at-home mom?  What do you DO all day?":

"Of course not all women can be at home full time. It’s one thing to acknowledge that; it’s quite another to paint it as the ideal. To call it the ideal, is to claim that children IDEALLY would spend LESS time around their mothers. This is madness. Pure madness. It isn’t ideal, and it isn’t neutral. The more time a mother can spend raising her kids, the better. The better for them, the better for their souls, the better for the community, the better for humanity. Period."

I wouldn't trade being a stay-at-home mom for all the tea in China!  It's the "job" I always wanted before I even knew I wanted it.  But make no mistake, SAHM's don't live on a pedestal but rather a shoestring (budget, that is) and often with little thanks or even acknowledgment of the sacrifices they make.  We still live in a country where it IS possible to stay home with your child(ren) almost regardless of your income.  There was a time when our income was only $20,000 a year with 3 children, the oldest only in kindergarten at the time...and I stayed home.  We weren't on WIC and my husband worked while also taking grad classes.  Classes that (once he found a job, no matter how menial) we paid for upfront without taking out further student loans.  We've yet to buy our first house but if that is the price we pay for having me home with our children, I'm happy to make that sacrifice!  It is worth every penny even on our worst days.  I'd love a break.  I welcome a break!  But as a general rule, I love spending time with my kids.  They are such a treasure!  Children were never meant to be a burden, but a blessing...probably the best retirement plan you could have!  :)

I don't say this to make those of you ladies (and gents) who work outside the home feel guilty for not being home with your kids.  I think for most of us (or at least those of you who follow my blog ;)) that's where we want to be!  I only wish to encourage you that if staying home is what you really want to do, it can be done!  It is possible!  It will take sacrifices financially- maybe that even means selling your house, but for most of us it would only take reigning in other expenses like not eating out very often, growing as much food as you can yourself, buying used everything and less of it, downgrading your phone (gasp!) and finding other ways to cut corners (couponing 101).  You can even homeschool for free!

Some day I plan to write a book entitled "I Survived a Single-wide".  To be honest (and I never imagined I'd say this), out of the seven homes we've lived in over the course of our married life, that single-wide nears the top of the list of faves for a variety of reasons.  Naturally, it helps that it was located close to my extended family but #2- it met our needs and #3- we could afford it.  Less financial stress breeds a happier home, I say. :) 

Through the generosity of a family member who procured free lodging for us (thank you!!) and by ringing out our grocery budget until it cried for mercy, we were even able to take a vacation to Disney World that year!  Praise the Lord, God is good.  So, my point is that we make time and money for what is important to us and that we have a tendency to all too often confuse want with need.  We wanted to go to Disney World (at least me and the kids did.  Justin had never gone so he didn't really know what he was missing.  Even now, and I don't understand this, I don't think he fell in love with it like we did. ;)).  Had we not been given the precious gift of lodging, we would have kept saving until we had enough to provide our own and I can guarantee it wouldn't have been as nice.  Super 8?  If it meant the difference between experiencing the magic of Disney or staying home, you betcha that it's good enough for me!

So, pay off those credit cards and tear them up.  Get yourself out of bondage and enslaved to your debt and start living large on a shoestring budget, loving and cuddling those precious babies!  Anyone can find a job, however "important" or "mundane" it is, but only YOU can be your babies' momma! ;)

Lessons from a 6 Year Old: A Rose is Blooming

 My facebook status update last night: 

"I think I missed my calling as a firefighter since all I ever seem to do is put out fires. I'm really highly qualified. ;) Currently, I'm trying to smother the flames that Rhea Lana consigning has created. In the meantime, our apartment is catching fire. Then, of course, there's the MOPS newsletter that is FULLY ablaze. (Whose brilliant idea was that again? ;)) Spring break x 2 (my husband's, then the boys'), birthdays x 2 (mine, then Sadie's), Easter... You get the picture.  March is an inferno!"

With that in mind, here is what happened on the drive to school this morning:

Morning Madness

"Mom, I put my clothes on and see...I found underwear in my drawer and put it on me."  I don't see because it's dark and my eyes and my aching body are struggling to find their function but I take his word for it.  Grammar is a work in progress for a child with a speech delay but I'm thankful that we can still understand him...most of the time.

"Ok, honey.  Good job."  I say, only half-intelligibly.

"And look.  I even have socks and shoes on my feet.  See?"  I don't look but feel a thud as he tries to hike his foot onto the bed and plops it in my lap.

The Theological Threes

I had an interesting lunch conversation with my darling 3 year old today.  It started with the usual torrent of questions, only this time the questions were a bit more difficult to answer and explain.  Justin and I try to be very honest in how we answer our children's questions while also trying to maintain age appropriateness.  That's a challenging task sometimes but we feel that it's important in providing them with a sense of security, safety, and trust in us, their parents.  Our philosophy is, "Reality is your friend."  I suppose another way of saying that is, "The truth will set you free."  With that in mind, here's today's dialogue:

Behind Every Raincloud...

*Disclaimer:  I did it again...I wrote a novel.  Sorry.  ;)

I have always considered myself to be an optimistic person.  Unfortunately, I have not had a very good attitude lately.  Stress is catching up with me, I guess, but that's really not a very good excuse.  A wise man once said, "I find that most of the things I end up complaining about are actually blessings."  That's been true for me recently.  It's also true what "they" say..."If Momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy."  Are you glad to see that I haven't lost my sense of humor? ;)  I'm trying to make a conscious effort to be more thankful and to notice just how blessed I truly am.  So, here's the scoop for those who are interested...

Tidy-Up Tip Tuesday 5/24

No, you're not crazy.  Today is really Wednesday.  Yes, I'm a day late posting this.  For whatever reason our computer (or blogger, not sure which) refused to sign my husband out of his blogging account yesterday so I could get into mine.  Anyway, here's your tip for the week.

This week I'm not showcasing a product as much as an idea.  With the kids now out of school for the summer and vacations on the rise, I thought this might be a good time to encourage everyone to set a routine early and stick to it.  (I'm preaching to myself now, too.  Ideas and theories I can handle.  Putting them into practice consistently is another matter entirely. haha)

So, my tip for the week is #1) set up a plan, #2) get the kids and spouse involved, and #3) institute the "pick-up before play" rule...or "PBP".  Now, this is a useless tip to all you super-moms out there who are highly organized and orderly.  However, for those of you who have trouble with this like I do, we can benefit from the accountability that comes from simply admitting our struggles and developing the discipline of a stable routine.  It will truly make for a happier home.

From what I understand, the first 21 days are critical to establishing new habits and behaviors.  Apparently, if you can stick to a new routine for 21 consecutive days, you are more likely to continue that pattern.  (I can only surmise that I haven't reached the golden 21-day mark in this respect yet. ;) )  So, my challenge for you today is to mark your calendar for the 21st day after implementing your plan.  Then, find an accountability partner (preferably someone who will call you out when you need it) and share specifically what you plan to accomplish and how you'll measure success.  Then, after 21 days, reward yourself for a job well-done!

Your plan will depend upon many factors affecting your specific family so it probably won't look exactly like ours or anyone else's.  Only you can determine what works best for you.  For us, my part of our plan is to start and finish at least one load of laundry and empty the dishwasher every MORNING (which also means the dishwasher will be loaded and dishes cleaned the night before).  For the kids, they will pick up their rooms and other toys before we go out anywhere (and before computer or television time) and everything will be put away before bedtime.  This is just part of the plan but if we can do this for 21 consecutive days, I'll consider it a success!

So, what will you do for the next 21 days?  Leave a comment below and let's help each other reach our goals  and enjoy a more relaxing and tidier home even during the hectic summer months!