What Happened to My Size 4 Self??

Ok, so I can't sleep tonight and this is the question that's keeping me awake.  A ridiculous question.  The answer is simple.  I started eating again, for starters.  Then, I got married.  (Yes, the infamous "I heard somewhere" that marriage alone tends to add a few pounds.)  Then I had baby, after baby, after baby.  With pretty much no breaks.  Until now.  Add to that the loss of a dear brother, my lack of exercise and poor dietary habits and this is what you get.  One fat mama.

I didn't get here overnight.  This was a gradual, slow descent into the ugly word, "obesity".  According to eprintablecalendars.com, my ideal weight is somewhere between 142 to 156 pounds.  If you're curious about your own, check out their chart.  Dr. Graber (whoever he is) gives a little more wiggle room allowing 160 as an acceptable "ideal" weight.  Medterms.com defines "obese" as being more than 20% over your ideal weight.  So, basically even with Dr. Graber's wiggle room, I'm still in the "obese" category.  That really is an ugly word, isn't it?  I mean, I don't even want to type it.  It sounds so much nicer and less offensive to say "overweight" instead.  The only problem with that is it's just putting lipstick on a pig.  Dress it up however you like.  At the end of the day, it's still a pig.

I never pictured myself here before.  At my heaviest I weighed 214 pounds.  (Gasp!  Did I just share my weight with the entire cyber WORLD?!!)  Thankfully, I've lost some of that weight, but not an incredible amount by any stretch.  I'm merely teetering on the fence of "One-derland".  (I did it again!!  Is nothing sacred anymore, Stephanie?!)  I suppose I feel comfortable sharing this because for one, (sadly) I've got plenty of company and secondly, light scatters the darkness so I'm thinkin' that if I shine a REALLY BIG LIGHT on my obesity (ugh, I really HATE that word.  This is like shock therapy.),  THE POUNDS will scatter and disappear, right?  I wish it were that simple.  Like I said, I didn't get here overnight.  It's not going to magically go away overnight.  It will take time and it will take effort but I will do it.  "As GOD as my witness, I WILL do it!" (just picture me standing, yelling, and shaking my fist in the air.)


I'm not naive enough to think that I'll ever get back to my size 4 frame.  I mean, hello!  I did birth 3 babies.  Hipbones have moved and it's highly unlikely that they'll be returning to their original state.  (Besides that, I was really TOO skinny at that size, probably weighed 130 pounds fully clothed and soaking wet, and going through a mild depression now that I look back on it.  Apparently, my family was worried about me then too.  Maybe I'll share that story some other time...and pictures.)  However, the layers of fat (That's right, I said it!  F.A.T. FAT!) surrounding those bones are in for a surprise!  I'm gonna obliterate them!  I have muscles that haven't been used in years but I can guarantee you they are still there!  After all, I played basketball and did track and field in high school.  I survived "Lady Tiger Pay the Price Week", People!!  That's no sissy stuff!!!  And I've got the shirt to prove it! ;)  So, who's with me?

Look out, Obesity!  You BIG, UGLY, DISGUSTING WORD, you!!  We got your number!!  You're going down!